Tuesday, July 3
Subject: Vandalism Of A Princess
Time: 12:25pm
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Subject: Dismissing A Kandinsky
Time: 12:36pm
Mort commands his daughter to walk over it.
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Subject: Amalgamation Of Mort And Farhad As A First Grader
Time: 12:40pm
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Subject: Post-Nazism
Time: 3:35pm
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Subject: Another View
Time: 3:37pm
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Subject: Modesty In Exhibitionism
Time: 3:41pm
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Subject: Mort’s Weapon Is His Ruby Tongue; His Witness Is His Tail!
Time: 3:42pm
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Subject: The Mask Of A Mumified Prehistoric Noble
Time: 4:42pm
Sahar: I love that!
Mort: You are bahyahteefuel!
Mina: Don’t ruin a perfectly good pretzel.
Mort: Mina is mean!
Mina: How original, dear.
Mort: Mina is cruel!
Mina: Now you’re just being redundant, dear.
Mort: Because u r being reductive.
Mina: Now you’re being nonsensical.
Saturday, July 7
Subject: Another Attempt To Vilify Mort
Time: 4:15pm
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Subject: “Made In China” Fails Again
Time: 5:29pm
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Subject: The Strength of the Iranian Lobby!
Time: 5:33pm
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Subject: Arbab Keymort Khan
Time: 5:34pm
Saturday, July 8
Subject: The Danger of Using an Alternate Distributor to Mort Pharma
Time: 12:46pm
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Subject: The U-Haul Flag Minutes Before I-Haul’s Coup Against It!
Time:12:50pm
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Subject: Mort, the Superfluous Visionary
Time: 1:01pm
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Subject: Deepak the Jackass Heads a Software Company
Time: 1:08pm
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Subject: The Elephant that Dared to do Greco-Roman Wrestling with Mort
Time: 2:34pm
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Subject: Bespectacled Murt
Time: 3:16pm
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Subject: The Dapper Murt
Time: 3:19pm
Yesterday
Subject: The Scientific Community Criticized Professor Morthausen Baharschofen’s Phrenology Experiments
Time: 8:18pm
Today
Subject: Is Fascist-Turism Making A Come Back?
Time: 3:35pm
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Subject: Jailmate With “Benefits”
Time: 3:37pm
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Subject: Self-Mortrait With Antenna
Time: 3:47pm
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Subject: Two Candidates Who Were Rejected As Mort’s Butlers
Time: 3:49pm
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Subject: The Eventual “Arab Spring”
Time: 3:51pm
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Subject: TSA Enforces its Own Version of Segregation at Airports
Time: 3:53pm
