Mort Should Have Taken Kurdistan When It was Offered To Him

Subject: “Where is my hairbrush? My eyeliner? My rouge?”
Time: 10:37am

The wounded warrior cried.

Subject: The New Crew at Hotel Sofitel Manhattan
Time: 10:39am

Subject: impressive…
Time: 1:04pm

Mina: You’re so Mortsy….
Mort: I was so swollen.

Subject: I thought Dracula was Romanian not Bulgarian!
Time: 3:55pm

Subject: Premarital Cybersex Allowed in the IRI
Time: 6:08pm

Subject: Kurdistan Was Offered to Mort, But He Declined the Offer!
Time: 6:54pm

Mina: Like George Washington, who was offered the kingship of America, but declined because he wanted to go back to his farm. George Mortington.
Mort: Perhaps because George wanted to visit his black mistress….or was that Benjamin Franklin?
Mina: That was Thomas Jefferson.
Mort: You are such an informed princess.

Subject: Eyeranian Cowboy Gone Wild!
Time: 7:47pm

Subject: Bestiality Gone Awry: The Prince Kills His Jealous Lover!
Time: 7:52pm

Subject: Fashion Statement: Falcons Are In This Season
Time: 7:56pm

Subject: A Deer’s Fascination With The Rifle Proves Disastrous!
Time: 8:00pm

Subject: Impotent Carpenter Voyeuristically Watches His Wife and Lover
Time: 8:08pm

Subject: Carrot Juice Impersonating Liquid Soap
Time: 10:08pm

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